I can’t really remember a worse kissing experience. They have all been pretty good, from the unexpected to the long session ones. I guess my first really romantic kiss, I was nervous and I wasn’t sure if I was doing it right.
I guess my worst kissing experience is dating a married woman, who was going through a divorce. She didn't like kissing very much and she certainly didn't like giving tongue. She'd kiss on the lips and she only kissed me one time. Wouldn't even kiss during sex and a woman kissing me and giving me tongue while she rides me is a huge turn on. I guess if they don't like kissing, then I guess that qualifies.
It was a work-related "('*date*')" set up by one of my bosses some 17 years ago or so.
It involved taking a van-load of office related crap up to a conference center just over the line in PA, setting up a table and backdrop and displays and all that the day before it started. Then going back up there and sit there for some 8 to 12 hours, then going back home. IF, and that is the biggest word on this entire page, if anybody asked a question, or wanted more information or whatever, you dealt with them. Otherwise, you sat there Thursday evening after setting up for a couple of hours, then all day Friday and Saturday, and then you were supposed to go back and be available Sunday morning then tear down and leave.
Pardon me while I do the Snoopy Dance for joy.
My boss decided that I would be the perfect one to take one of the newer female employees up there and show her the ropes. Ms Boss Lady also mentioned that Miss Thusandso was single, as, at the time, I was also, being widowed some time before. The new employee in question was a few years younger than myself, and wasn't hard to look at, and, when well dressed, she was reasonably attractive.
What she didn't mention was that Miss Thus.... smoked like the Marlboro man. She couldn't ride in the van for more than half an hour without smoking.
She also cussed like the entire Fifth Fleet. Had never been anywhere or done anything, but she did have the tattoo. And didn't know the more technical side of our office from a tree stump. She did however have a relative who was a ranking politician in the state.
We had ZERO in common except for where we got our paycheck.
We spent the majority of four days in each other's company. She appreciated my patience and, evidently my sense of humor, and my ability to turn ANY comment into some sort of sexual reference with or without prompting.
Saturday night I dropped her off and she kissed me goodbye and apologized that she couldn't go back on Sunday to tear down.
It was like kissing the Marlboro Man.
We never went on another 'date' of any description.
The switch for the exhaust fan is there next to the light switch by the door.
One memory that came up during that bit above was of the "floor manager" lady at the conference center who worked for the local economic office that ran the place.
If you watched Stargate SG-1 you may remember Colonel O'Neill saying:
The event lady was THAT.
She was forty-ish and Very Pretty, in a "top of the line Plastic Surgeon's best work" way, dressed to the nines in one step down from a fancy name French designer's best work, and wore perfume that could knock a mosquito out of the air from five paces. She strutted around the hall in heels that clicked when she walked, with her clipboard and made sure your booth was manned from open to close and that if you had music playing it wasn't too loud, with hair and makeup that looked EXACTLY the same at 0700 at it did at 1730.
If given the choice of going out with her or the human ashtray, I think I'd take the ashtray.